...And That's
My Opinion©
By Sandy Goldman
The Rogers Park Community
Curmudgeon
A Cub Fan's View
Last month I went to a baseball game.
Not just any baseball game!
Last month I went to the Cubs - White Sox
game.
Last month I went to the North vs. the South
baseball game. (Or as native Chicahgans would put it "The Nort' vs. the
Sout'").
Forgive me Mrs. Elia. (see previous column:
"Someone to Watch Over Them")
Those readers not from Chicago will no doubt
have trouble understanding that this is more than a baseball game. It is the
Hatfields and the McCoys - the Cubs and the Sox. Even if, as I read, the
descendents of the former are ready to make peace - the latter are not!!
The first thing I noticed as we approached
the high tech 1,300,000 square foot, pre-cast colored concrete, 5-level
behemoth was the arched windows (they are not visible at all from the inside)
and the west exposure which resembled a huge ugly parking facility. Another
thing I noticed is that there were no hawkers selling parking spaces in front
of their homes, in their driveways, lawns, empty lots or in front of or
alongside bars and restaurants. In fact there were no bars and restaurants in
the immediate vicinity. There was an awful lot of football type tailgating.
Perhaps it's a Sout' side mental affliction manifested by sports confusion.
There was also, a huge concrete area manned
by yellow-jacketed attendants moving around like little hornets, waving cars
here and there, in lots marked Lot A, Lot B etc. I’m sure that the lettering is
so that happy Sox Fans can stomp around and sing in unison "Now I know my
ABC’s."
It should be noted that there are 12
escalators, 11 elevators, six outdoor kennels (I should refrain from the
"going to the dogs" comment - but what the heck) and three industrial
strength garbage compactors (no comment needed).
The stadium, it should be further noted, is
owned by the Illinois Sports Facilities Authority and is leased by the Chicago
White Sox. It was 100% funded by public financing - $167 million - from a 2%
hotel tax in Chicago. Maybe there should be a fourth garbage compactor.
In the Wrigleyville area there are any number
of interesting watering holes. One of them is the Cubby Bear lounge. If the
Chicago Cardinals football team had not left the original Comiskey Park some
years ago there might have been a Soxy - Cards lounge. I don’t think so!!
But there is plenty of food inside the park
and plenty of booze also. The attendance that day was 44,140; I swear that at
one time or another half of them were waiting in line for food or beer. Did
they come to eat or watch baseball?
The concourse area is 40 feet wide and runs
from one end of the stadium around to the other end. It is a food emporium
selling hot dogs, Italian beef, pastrami sandwiches, chicken, pretzels, beer;
soda and ice cones in paper cups; and a sugary little delicacy whose name I don’t
want to remember. There is also a variety of non- novelty shops. In
right field there is a kids corner and kids gift shop for ages 12 and under -
that is years, not I.Q. Near the third base side there is a baseball card photo
shop. Behind the home plate area there is an ATM which was in constant use. I
must hand it to the White Sox executives - they have figured out more ways to
nick the customers than any carnival I have ever worked.
For those who don’t want to mingle on the
concourse there is the Stadium Club, a special rendezvous for season ticket
holders - at extra cost of course. It provides three levels of Levy Enterprises
full food service. For those who want to mingle with those who don’t want to
mingle with the crowds, there are over 100 luxury skyboxes called Diamond
Suites, at extra cost - corporate level living.
The first level of the Stadium Club is the
bar; the third level is the Club and in between is a white tablecloth restaurant.
The Club and the Restaurant are terraced (I did not get to the lower level)
thus affording a good view of the field. I was told the first row seats along
the window have a cover charge. All seats were $5.00 extra after the first
pitch. Extra special living. The Club level has a huge circular bar and it was
crowded. There was also a gaggle of friendly, efficient wait-staffers, both
male and female.
The best was yet to come. Walking through
Section 534, I noted the change from letters to numbers, now happy Sox fans can
demonstrate their ability to recognize numbers as well as the alphabet.
The stadium is huge. Looking back at the
steep incline 29 rows up, I was reminded of our recent trip to Peru and
climbing the intrepid Machu Piccu. In Cuzco, Peru they give people a mild tea
made from coca leaves to adjust to the altitude. I think Sox fans do the same
thing, only it’s not the leaves.
I must tell you that I was not prepared for
the next sight. Across the field from home plate, left, right and center was a
wall - just a big blue eight foot wall!! Where was the ivy? There-was-no-green-ivy.
My God - no ivy of any color! There was, however, a plethora of advertising
above the wall and the bleachers: some illuminated, some moving and rotating,
some flashing, but all dizzying and distracting.
In the middle, over the 3,400 bleacher seats
was the 140'X80' exploding scoreboard which produces the famous fireworks when
a Sox player hits a homerun. (Yes, yes, I know I heard it, not once, but
twice!) I leave further explanation alone, enough has been written about the
fireworks. But in the center of the scoreboard is the 26’ x 37’ Sony Jumbo-Tron
screen which sometimes is instant replay and sometimes not. But it is always
transmitting extraneous pieces of baseball trivia. It must make the Sox fans
feel as if they are contestants on "Who Wants to be a Millionaire".
I’m sure the operator must feel like Regis Philbin. When it is not testing the
accumulated acumen of the fans (note: no grades are given - whew!) it displays
the picture and stats of the current batter. This so those who went for food
can know who’s at bat. Those who went for beer don’t know what city they’re in
, much less the park or the batter. There are 38 public washrooms! I don’t have
a gender breakdown, but I’ve been told that sometimes, when it is crowded, it
did not make any difference.
Below the right field bleachers, Cub fans
will not believe this, is a picnic patio and a bar near the bullpen. If they
had staged the Bleacher Bums, a well-known play (at least to Northsiders),
using Comiskey Park instead of Wrigley Field as the locale, it could have been
titled "Picknicky at Comiskey".
For those who did not come to eat--watching
the game is now secondary--there is a section devoted to audio/visual games
and, now get this, a batting cage. All Sox fans fantasize about being Carlton
Fisk. Fisk was a true hero who is tied for Sox homeruns in a single year(37).
He also holds the major league record for catchers (376). A six-time All Star
he played 11 years for the Boston Red Sox and then changed colors for 12 years
with the White Sox. He left the White Sox on such bad terms that he might go
into the Hall of Fame wearing a Red Sox hat. He came to play not to eat.
Although he did a lot of the latter but not at the ballpark!!
For those who feel the need or are informed
of the need, there is , so help me, a misting shower area.
My first visit to the park was several years
ago when a torrential downpour ended the game at the third inning. Running to
our car to avoid the flood I was sure that Mrs. E was going to send Noah to
save her two Cub fans. This was my second visit. The game lasted 14 innings; we
stayed for 12. To avoid the crowd on the Dan Ryan, always a good move late at
night, we drove down (or is it up?) Canal Street. Lo and behold there are
houses on this street. There are people who live in them. My companion, or is
it guide, told me that this was Bridgeport. I looked for the mayor. I was told
he had moved. Natch!!
And now so must I. Maybe my next visit
should be to the Schaumburg Flyers. Do they have food?
Oh, by the way, the Sox won!! It was a great
game!!
Postscript: We left at the right time. It
seems that some Bridgeport thugs beat up a reporter from WMPV at 33rd and Wells
. This is several blocks from the stadium at one of the few nearby bars.
There are bums and hooligans
everywhere--North and South!!!
...And that's my opinion.
And I'm Sandy Goldman
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To Email Me: smgoldman@ameritech.net